4. The Power of Words

Negative words guide our thoughts.

NOTHING HAS EVER or will ever be created without the presence of words. The home you live in, the clothes you wear, and the car you drive were all created after the presence of three little words, “Let there be”. [biblegateway passage="Genesis 1:1-26"]

The same is true for the company that employees you and the product or service your company offers to the world. Whether your parents planned you or not, even you were created after the presence of the same three words.

Words determine your thoughts, feelings, attitude, desires, and behavior. Words precede your character and begin every relationship.

The point I’m trying to make is this:

WORDS MATTER.

The understanding of how words work in your life is a matter of life and death.

Freedom or bondage.

Intimacy or isolation.

You have a long history with words. They were communicated to you at the beginning of your life and soon thereafter, you began to give meaning to those words. At this stage of your life, you also gave meaning to non-verbal words communicated to you through facial expression, body language, and actions.

The meaning you gave to words, verbal and non-verbal, was stored in your heart, the human body’s first brain. It was not the verbal and non-verbal communication that guided your behavior thereafter, but rather the meaning you gave to words.

This conversation is important because you could not, and cannot control what was actually communicated to you as a child, but today, as you are trying to solve the problems out there, you have the opportunity to revisit the meaning you attached to what was communicated to you.

You might wonder what your childhood has to do with you now, but unless you can tell me that you had a frontal lobotomy yesterday, I will tell you that you have been very busy your entire life attaching meaning to everything that happened or didn’t happen to you.

Your subconscious mind considers the meaning you attached to everything that happened or didn’t happen to you as the gospel truth, and until you change the meaning, your subconscious mind, forgetting nothing, will direct your thoughts, feelings, attitude, desires, and behavior today. Why?

It is because your subconscious mind is designed to protect you.

It can calculate what you should do faster than you can think, and even though you may end up in the ditch, you cannot blame your subconscious mind. It responds only to the information given it by the conscious mind.

Like a computer; garbage in, garbage out.

Negative in, negative out.

Positive in, positive out.

Truth in, truth out.

...to put off your old self, which belongs to your former manner of life and is corrupt through deceitful desires,  and to be renewed in the spirit of your minds, and to put on the new self, created after the likeness of God in true righteousness and holiness.--Ephesians 4:22-24(Italics mine)

Now, take a breath, and relax. You are an adult, but now you have the chance to change the meaning you attached to your past. Remember, you do not have to relive an unresolved childhood to identify the words you say to yourself about your past.

How is this so?

It is because by changing the meaning you attached to your past, you will also change your thoughts, feelings, attitude, desires, and behavior going forward.

At some point, you may even look back and be grateful for the problems you had out there.

The problem inside you is not an easy fix. It is simple, but because the human being is so complex, it takes time to correct. It takes effort and persistent practice to overcome.

It also takes courage.

However, it takes more courage to be an adult while giving control of your destiny over to a child, which in essence is what we do until we choose to stop.

Please don’t be discouraged because I said it takes time to correct. As quickly as you can see a different meaning, you can choose to accept it. For example, you might have believed you were fired from a job without good reason, but after capturing the negative words strung together about what happened, you might see another meaning available to you. I’ll give you an example.

I was unfairly terminated from a consulting job and it was a difficult blow. At first, my demons said I deserved better, but as I focused on my growing anger, humiliation, and pride, the demons also said I didn’t deserve the success I saw in the future with that company.

I spent a weekend nursing my wounds, and the meaning I assigned to the event went something like this: My client is a greedy, selfish, unkind pig. How dare him falsely accuse me of not being responsible for the success I brought from my experience and knowledge.

My story about what happened grew, not only by getting collaboration from friends and family but also by my subconscious mind.

The shame and humiliation from being fired triggered my subconscious to remind me of other times things didn’t go my way and before I knew it, I wasn’t the powerful woman I had been, but I felt like a little girl lost.

Alone, my thoughts turned grim as my demons reminded me what I really believed about myself: I’m not good enough. I don’t matter. I can’t trust people, especially men. I’m not worth what I think I’m worth. I am a fraud.

Can you see the downward spiral when focused on negative energy?

Stuck in a pit of despair, God did something for me before I ever knew he really loved me. He gave me a different meaning to consider: Read More...

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