Tag: faith and trust

house hanging on the edge


A Good Church Lady knows that fear is a sin. Jesus never said, “Try not to be afraid.” He said, “Do not be afraid.”


And every time he said this, which was the commandment he spoke more than any other, he always explained why to his sheep. (more…)


No Pain No Gain

“LAY BACK DOWN right now. If you don’t your guts are going to be all over the floor.” 

Of course, I did not know the doctor had already ripped through half of the six or eight inches of my lower abdomen with his scalpel in a typical, yet unplanned C-section gone bad.  (more…)

Dark Valley

20. The Valley of the Shadow of Death

AT THE RISK OF being condemned by the church people, I want you to consider the possibility of a dark side to God. To say there is a dark side of God may seem blasphemous, but it is my perception—and you may take it as only my opinion of reality—that God has a dark side.

To believe that God has no dark side is a contradiction to what you will find in the Old and New Testament of the Bible.

For example, God told Abraham to take his son Isaac up a mountain and sacrifice him as a burnt offering.

If Abraham had run down to the church to get the opinion of others, what do you suppose they might say about Abraham? My guess is they would have thought Abraham was off his rocker or listening to the devil, and then called Child Protective Services to get Isaac out of harm’s way.

How could a good God do something so evil?

You may recall the atrocities performed at the hand of Saddam Hussein, who thought of himself as the reincarnation of the former murderous king of Babylon, Nebuchadnezzar. God said in the books of Daniel and Jeremiah that he put the evil Nebuchadnezzar in power.

Can this be the works of a good God?

Also, contrary to popular belief, it was not Satan’s idea, but God who gave Satan the idea and authority to destroy, but not kill Job, a man God declared as righteous.

It was God who said, in the book of Acts, that he chose Paul as an instrument to carry the name of the Lord before the Gentiles and kings and the children of Israel.

He also said, “I will show him how much he must suffer for the sake of my name.”

Would a good God cause pain and suffering to his faithful followers?

It was Jesus who foretold Peter’s brutal death. And it was Jesus who suffered so much angst that he sweated blood the night before his brutal death, and God who said that he gave his innocent son to die for the sins of the world.

Would a good God bring to death one he loved?

Jesus said there is no one good except his father, the God of creation. And, I believe, given enough time, Jesus will be proven correct. But, until that day comes, can you agree with me that God appears to be both good and evil?

I have learned that appearances can fool us.

It was my faulty belief—which is nothing more than my opinion rather than the truth—that if I obeyed God, he would bless me with a hedge of protection around me.

The belief was that God would protect me against the wiles of Satan. The belief was that if I were devoted to God, I would enjoy a full measure of love and security. And after eighteen years of following the Lord, God appeared to be all good.

And then the Lord appeared to change.

At first, I was concerned about how I was going to look to the world around me when I seemed to have fallen out of God’s favor, and my abundant life turned into scarcity.

But, still clinging to my faith as my life turned upside down, I was then concerned about how God was going to look to the world around me.

It seemed to me that we both had reputations to uphold, me being the faithful church lady, and he, well, he being a good God.

As he led me through my valley of the shadow of death, where my demons lived, and I did not rest comfortably by the still waters, the truth was revealed to me.

I learned that I have no clue what good is.

I also have no clue what evil is.

Good and evil are value words used to describe my perception of reality.

I learned that I do not have enough information to declare what is good and evil, but I do have enough faulty beliefs to think that I do.

Today, I have a better understanding of why Adam and Eve had to eat the forbidden fruit from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil; why it was God and not Satan in control of that scene; why God set them up to disobey the only rule given; and why they had to be banished from their paradise. Read More...

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